I wish we were half as funny as the guys over at Deadspin, but unfortunately I don’t think we’ll ever big big enough dicks. They wrote a harsh and I hesitate to say it…sometimes accurate article on why the eagles are going to suck this year. Where do you think they’re right…where are they way off base, check it out:

1. Always beware the offseason winners. So the Eagles drafted LeSean McCoy (who looked most excellent catching the ball out of the backfield Thursday night) and Jeremy Maclin (who has had fumbling problems during the preseason), and traded for Jason Peters to give Donovan McNabb more protection. Plus, they have Michael Vick in to to run the Wildcat. On paper, that all adds up to one kickass offense. Few teams, with the exception of Chicago’s trade for Jay Cutler, made the kind of big offseason moves that the Eagles did. Indeed, plenty of people think this is the year Philly finally puts it all together and wins the Super Bowl. Andy Behrens picked them to win it all. Vegas has them at 11-1 odds to pull it off. They’re a chic pick.

Chic picks always end up fucking up. Take it from a fan of another team that made a big offseason move that will almost certainly end up becoming a flaming helicopter wreck. A chic preseason Super Bowl will fuck you in the ass. It’s like those fashionable, not-quite-as-traditional college teams that are ranked in the Top 5 of the AP poll, like Georgia was last year. Teams that are “loaded” coming into the season always end up fucking it all up. And why should the Eagles be immune to any of this inevitable failed hype? After all…

2. Hey, Andy Reid’s still coaching this team, right? Remember, this is a guy who failed to inform his star quarterback last year that games can end in ties. Not only is Andy Reid a poor game manager, he’s an AGGRESSIVELY POOR game manager. Not only will he end up fucking up the game, but he’ll fuck it up by using the most illogical strategy he can possibly devise. More importantly, he will take hours upon hours to implement that strategy. For the Eagles, huddling during the last two minutes of a game isn’t an option, it’s fucking mandatory. It’s just the kind of team-building exercise that can really help Reid’s men cope with the agony of losing yet another 4-point game that ended with Brian Westbrook getting stuffed on a power rushing play that he wasn’t well-suited for.

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The Exhibit

I caught up with Jared Wheeler of Mitchell and Ness about history, Fandom, and Rappers… Thanks to Nancy Pants aka precious/pretty lady for hooking this up. Jared seems like a good dude who has the best job of about anyone I ever encountered. Read on, if you are a baseball fan or like making fun of people, you’ll  be stoked.

Tell those who don’t know, a little bit about the exhibit “Play Ball” that’s running now through October at the Betsy Ross House?
The exhibit “Play Ball” explores the history of baseball throughout the city of Philadelphia. It traces the origins of our past time back to the 1800’s and concludes with the 2008 World Series Champion Phillies. Arranged within the exhibit is the history of Philadelphia’s two Major League clubs, the Phillies and the Athletics. The exhibit also captures the Bonnet League Bobbies; a woman’s barnstorming team that was established after the passing of the 19th amendment. It also highlights the social injustice of segregation, an institution which was informally put in place by team owners. The Negro Leagues were formed out of segregation and several prominent teams are focused on within the exhibit. This is a sure spot to hit up this summer if you are a ball fan. (Read up on Play Ball! here)

THERE’S A LOT MORE AFTER THE JUMP

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In a time in which “throw backs” are all the rage with the kids, I wanted to introduce you to a true “throw back”, Atom Goren. Among other things Atom is a family man, musician, punk rocker, and master of a dog named “books“. However, far down that list, Atom is a sports fan, and in particular a Hockey fan. With the hockey world a buzz in the Finals, I decided to shoot Atom A few questions to answer about “the coolest game on ice.” (and a question about the coolest game under I-95)

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Dan Gross. What can be said about this man that has not already been said?

 For those who are not familiar with the fine work of Mr. Gross, he can be found Monday - Thursday in the Philadelphia Daily News. His Gossip Column is a must read. It really does have it all.  Sports, celeb sitings, gossip, hardcore heroes of yore… And did I ever tell you that Dan is the reason that I am married today?

 We decided to put the matchmaker, former hardcore alum, and sports fan to the test….

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David Wagenschutz. If you are not familier with the name, you are definitely familiar with his work. He has been the backbone to many of your favorite punk bands. Playing for the likes of Lifetime, Kid Dynamite, Good Riddance, Ink & Dagger, and Paint It Black. What I know of this man is that he loves his Family, his Drums and his Flyers. Lets see what he has to say about whats going on in the Flyers Nation.

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I like to take this opportunity to welcome a friend to Choketown. Mr. Ronnie Little.

For those not familiar with his work; Ron, pictured above sang for PA’s own Rain on the Parade in the early to mid 90’s. They never disappointed on record, tape, or live.

I caught up with Ronnie yesterday for an interview about his favorite team. The Flyers. (continue reading…)

You are all aware of my, sometimes, unhealthy obsession with the web site Hockeybuzz.com. I check the site probably 15-20 times a day easy. I really enjoy checking out the blog entries for the teams The Flyers are going to play that week/day and I, in a very twisted way, enjoy reading the “comment” section in which the fans of the opponents talk sh….well, they say unflattering things about our boys. I decided to shoot the resident Capitals writer Steven Hindle a few questions about the Cinderella of the NHL playoffs.

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From my earliest memory I braved the cold in a green Eagles hat with that odd puff ball on the top. I remember vividly throwing on my red coat, Mickey Mouse mittens and that damn hat. I also remember begging my mom to cut the puff off because kids at school were pulling it off my head and throwing it around. Now, fear not, i did not want the puff cut off because I was trying to avoid the teasing, I just didn’t want them to lose my hat. Growing up in the Philadelphia suburbs provided me with unique memories of Dr.J, Mike Schmidt, Bobby Clarke and Mike Quick. I used to wonder if growing up in A different area would have provided the same memories. Had I grown up in Hartford would i have fond memories of the Whalers? Probably not….that team always stank.

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Before we move any further into this “blog community”, I wanted to turn the looking glass inward for a second. How do we expect people to read what we write, if they don’t know who is writing it? Now, we are not here to spill our guts or cry about relationships, religion or the government. We are simply here to talk about Philadelphia sports. Nothing more, nothing less. So lets meet this gaggle of jerk-off’s we have here at Choketown dot com.

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Sports and punk rock are two worlds that, and any adolescent can tell you, don’t necessarily co-exist. For me, Ron Hextall was as important as Ian Mackye was. Two men that have nothing in common, but help shape the man i am today. I still value the footage of Hexy scoring a goal and raising his arms in celebration just the same as i value the footage of Minor Threat at the 9:30 club in Washington D.C. Neither more important, but honorable just the same.

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